“Dear America: Sorry We’re So Awesome” – Love, Canada

“Dear America: Sorry We’re So Awesome” – Love, Canada

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…with apologies to my American friends who aren’t jerks. 

Everyone loves Canadians; until we best them at hockey.  Then apparently we become maple syrup-sucking “eh”-holes…please forgive my “French-Canadian.”

The public result of Canada beating the United States in both men’s and women’s hockey at the Sochi Olympics was a rather nasty hash-tag that topped the Twitter trends two days running.  Now, I don’t believe social media is news – however, it does provide a glimpse into the mindset of those who use it; especially when a sentiment is expressed often enough to become a top trend.

I’ve been told by several Americans that the United States – as a whole – is like a teenager trying to find their way in the world; periodically throwing tantrums when things don’t go their way.

The collective reaction to being bested by Canadians certainly lent proof to that observation: throwing out maple syrup, threats to cut down maple trees, and no longer planning to be nice people were just some of the sentiments attached to the Twitter hash-tag.  And to top it off, at least one U.S. bar refused to sell Canadian beer during the men’s face-off.

But no worries, we were not offended.  In true Canadian form, we apologized.  It’s what we do.  But, hockey is also “what we do” – so really, it should have come as no surprise when we wiped the floor with you…but again, sorry for being so awesome.

In all fairness – had we lost – Canadians would have reacted in much the same way, except perhaps a little less profane on paper…although not in our hearts or souls.

After all, we are hockey, and hockey is war.

But you can take heart America, you bested us on Twitter.  You can be proud of your profanity-laced, anti-Canadian rants.  We’ll be okay.  We’ll just take these gold medals home as a consolation prize for not being as clever…

In all seriousness, congratulations to everyone – from every country – who participated in these Olympics.  You’ve proven that gold is more than a medal; it’s a state of mind.

Erin Drushel

One comment

  1. treebeard says:

    Look in the comments area of any report that isn’t moderated, in any print or electronic medium, in the United State or Canada, and you’ll find it overrun by slopeheaded, knuckle-dragging, slobbering trolls, their intellectual capabilities clearly evident from their apparent orthographic, grammatical and compositional incompetence. This is most evident in mass circulation media with a liberal viewpoint.

    This is more common in the United States than Canada for one simple reason – they outnumber us more than ten to one. So they should have, statistically, the equivalent of, say, ten Ford Nations (God forbid!)

    There is reason to expect such individuals might be more socially isolated, too – given their attitudes and intellectual limitations – and, faut de mieux, more inclined to bray out their frustrations in the social media, likely the only ones that won’t throw them out for their offensive behaviour.

    Given that by definition half the population is below average in intelligence, it’s hardly surprising that they vent their primitive emotions in whatever milieu will allow it – like Twitter.

    But these troglodytes are a fact of life and cannot be excluded totally. So yes, there will be places where barbaric rantings will be the norm, and ten times more of them will be Americans than Canadians. Those are the numbers.

    But let’s not get smug. Remember how many people voted for Harper, Hudak and Ford – and stay calm.

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